Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize
