she peed on how many people?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
