I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
