Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize