think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I just found puke in my bra..
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
