its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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