Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
