I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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