Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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