i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
