Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
