We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
