Fuck appropriateness.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize