The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize