Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
