I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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