I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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