Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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