dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
