Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...

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  (248): I fell asleep on the toilet again last night... http://tfl.nu/rzc7
  Replies (3) Good night (772) Bad night (920)
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  (909): View more from California

  I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.

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  (909): I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea. http://tfl.nu/jmc9
  Replies (22) Good night (3428) Bad night (675)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.

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  (330): The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life. http://tfl.nu/g5ok
  Replies (37) Good night (15609) Bad night (1409)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling

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  (708): having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling http://tfl.nu/2wgp
  Replies (8) Good night (3185) Bad night (1200)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.

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  (817): I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number. http://tfl.nu/dwaz
  Replies (1) Good night (2787) Bad night (712)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.

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  (715): Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way. http://tfl.nu/o1v6
  Replies (3) Good night (2542) Bad night (1469)
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  (+03): View more from

  Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'

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  (+03): Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here' http://tfl.nu/86hi
  Replies (14) Good night (6621) Bad night (1449)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.

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  (270): I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles. http://tfl.nu/5ga0
  Replies (13) Good night (3254) Bad night (1493)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.

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  (419): i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go. http://tfl.nu/8sa8
  Replies (29) Good night (2523) Bad night (786)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified

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  (603): More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified http://tfl.nu/si7g
  Replies (5) Good night (1568) Bad night (659)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?

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  (304): I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this? http://tfl.nu/dpdb
  Replies (31) Good night (1073) Bad night (1721)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.

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  (215): Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit. http://tfl.nu/g1ie
  Replies (0) Good night (961) Bad night (437)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF

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  (267): he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment (267): HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF http://tfl.nu/xvhl
  Replies (3) Good night (861) Bad night (463)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.

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  (815): I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home. http://tfl.nu/5egk
  Replies (4) Good night (708) Bad night (334)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.

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  (717): This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits. http://tfl.nu/qs9c
  Replies (1) Good night (417) Bad night (242)

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