seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize