I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
