Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
