Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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