You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Randomize
