when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
