god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize