His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
