Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
