There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
