Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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