I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
