I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
