I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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