Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
