Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
