Texts From Last Night

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  (514): View more from Quebec

  I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.

  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  They always sound like a bunch of chickens.

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  (514): I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record. (709): They always sound like a bunch of chickens. http://tfl.nu/9qu6
  Replies (23) Good night (876) Bad night (2097)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.

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  (401): They should make Glad Forceflex condoms. http://tfl.nu/qnot
  Replies (12) Good night (5870) Bad night (782)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.

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  (859): you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it. http://tfl.nu/q4is
  Replies (33) Good night (9537) Bad night (1419)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?

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  (817): Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for? http://tfl.nu/2cqu
  Replies (5) Good night (3699) Bad night (1197)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back

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  (503): well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back http://tfl.nu/ecfc
  Replies (5) Good night (3133) Bad night (1518)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.

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  (501): I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus. http://tfl.nu/lpxj
  Replies (19) Good night (4512) Bad night (1963)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?

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  (814): How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed? http://tfl.nu/yb44
  Replies (8) Good night (2688) Bad night (637)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.

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  (519): Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked. http://tfl.nu/677j
  Replies (6) Good night (494) Bad night (1273)
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath

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  (807): Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath http://tfl.nu/x0dh
  Replies (7) Good night (2677) Bad night (602)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag

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  (905): today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag http://tfl.nu/a7zv
  Replies (5) Good night (1640) Bad night (749)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.

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  (617): I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug. http://tfl.nu/jnbd
  Replies (3) Good night (1059) Bad night (438)
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  (898): View more from

  Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.

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  (898): Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous. http://tfl.nu/8yxh
  Replies (2) Good night (680) Bad night (340)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick

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  (478): I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick http://tfl.nu/ahbd
  Replies (1) Good night (346) Bad night (521)
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  (619): View more from California

  Then again, he has huge mansions.

  (619): View more from California

  *manboobs.

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  (619): Then again, he has huge mansions. (619): *manboobs. http://tfl.nu/0ptq
  Replies (3) Good night (382) Bad night (674)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover

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  (602): Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover http://tfl.nu/gmcv
  Replies (0) Good night (369) Bad night (242)

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