Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this

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  (248): how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this http://tfl.nu/j8rr
  Replies (3) Good night (761) Bad night (757)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.

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  (250): even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real. http://tfl.nu/de62
  Replies (29) Good night (4914) Bad night (516)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.

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  (630): We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives. http://tfl.nu/wwoi
  Replies (5) Good night (3921) Bad night (908)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.

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  (613): Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs. http://tfl.nu/sez7
  Replies (9) Good night (1105) Bad night (3072)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes

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  (248): whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes http://tfl.nu/s924
  Replies (10) Good night (3457) Bad night (1296)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow

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  (908): We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow http://tfl.nu/g44q
  Replies (2) Good night (1448) Bad night (752)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.

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  (931): Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex. http://tfl.nu/b52l
  Replies (10) Good night (2716) Bad night (889)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.

  (407): View more from Florida

  yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.

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  (813): his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call. (407): yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer. http://tfl.nu/agts
  Replies (10) Good night (3028) Bad night (836)
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl

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  (225): We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl http://tfl.nu/f3ra
  Replies (5) Good night (897) Bad night (1333)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"

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  (214): I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy" http://tfl.nu/b3zm
  Replies (3) Good night (901) Bad night (899)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Love me.

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Just for one nugget?

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  (508): Love me. (781): GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS. (508): Just for one nugget? http://tfl.nu/9y03
  Replies (6) Good night (2752) Bad night (689)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.

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  (202): I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas. http://tfl.nu/fady
  Replies (0) Good night (1051) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later

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  (319): Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later http://tfl.nu/ccad
  Replies (5) Good night (791) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  Han Solo would be ashamed of me.

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  (903): Han Solo would be ashamed of me. http://tfl.nu/aspn
  Replies (7) Good night (498) Bad night (366)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna

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  (416): 7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna http://tfl.nu/ilm9
  Replies (2) Good night (248) Bad night (395)

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