all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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