we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
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