I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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