plz talk dirty to me
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
