Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
