Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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