Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize