just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
