tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
