are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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