idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
