remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
