singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
