new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize