I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Randomize
